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Stress/Pressure Management: Delaying the Inevitable

The more we understand ourselves and our particular strengths and abilities, the more we can get out of life (both now and in the future and at work and at home) and do what we feel we are capable of doing. To understand yourself or have a concept of ‘self’, you are likely to have a clear view of a number of components as follows:

  • the physical self (body image and your view of your physical attributes)
  • the social self (how you believe others see you)
  • the ideal/perfect self (how you would like to be in the future)
  • the present self (as you see yourself today – warts and all)
  • the intellectual self (how you regard your state of learning)
  • the emotional self (the emotions that you believe define you)

All of these components combine to create a positive or a negative self-concept. As such, it is possible to have both positive and negative feelings in each component, all of which may average out to create a reasonably balanced (or usually slightly positive) view.

Those people with a negative self-concept are likely to be more unhappy, anxious and self-critical. On the other hand, positive self-concept people tend to be happy, congenial, friendlier and self-reliant. Consequently, it is critical to develop or enhance positive feelings about yourself and your own skills and abilities.

There are two major ways to learn how to improve your self-management and control (and to handle the varying stress management tools better).

Firstly, you can develop your self-confidence and self-reliance. This means taking control of your own feelings rather than to be a ‘hostage’ to what others think of you. This gives you a sound and stable foundation upon which you can set your own standards. However, care should be taken to set realistic standards. If they are too high, failure will occur and stress may result.

Secondly, individuals need to not only give themselves positive strokes but also make sure that they avoid comparing themselves unfavorably with others and other situations. This means taking an independent view and aiming to cope by being confident, resilient and resourceful in your own capacity, and avoid being negatively impacted by others. When an individual is a manager of others, this includes individuals who may not care much about pressure or deadlines and simply delegate these problems and the stresses that go with them upwards. When people are properly in control of themselves they are in a better position to hold such people accountable for their own actions.

The featured video clip is drawn from the ReadyToManage, Rapid Skill Builder Stress/Pressure Management Video Vignette Set.

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About Dr. Jon Warner

Dr. Jon Warner is a prolific author, management consultant and executive coach with over 25 years experience. He has an MBA and a PhD in Organizational Psychology. Jon can be reached at

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About the Editor and Primary Author

Jon Warner

Jon Warner is an executive coach and management consultant and in the past has been a CEO in three very different companies. Read more

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